The FBI Again

[Bigaldoc]

This is too funny to put in the Security Forum. And it's not the first time the "FBI" has sent me a notice like this. Of course, MailWasher Pro labeled it as spam, but I copied this from the preview window first: (the underscores are mine)

• • Anti-Terrorist And Monetary Crimes Division
    FBI Headquarters, Washington, D.C.
    Federal Bureau Of Investigation
    J.Edgar Hoover Building
    935 Pennsylvania Avenue, Nw Washington, D.C. 20535-0001
    
    
    Attention:Honorable Beneficiary,
    
    
    This is to inform you that it has come to the notice of the federal bureau of investigation (FBI) that the sum of $10.5 million united states dollars were transferred from the central bank of Nigeria to the bank of America here in the united states, bearing your name as the beneficiary.
    
    We did not believe this at first until we saw the transfer, then we had no other option than to place the funds on hold until you are able to prove to us that you are not a terrorist or a money launderer, by obtaining what is called a diplomatic immunity seal of transfer certificate from the funds originated country.
    
    Note that we have done a proper investigation on this transaction and from our investigation, this funds truly belongs to you and it is not a scam, but we have instructed the bank of America not to release the $10.5 million to you until you prove the legitimacy of the funds you are about to receive.
    
    As a matter of fact, you will be charged for money laundering and terrorism, if you fail to prove to us that you are not a terrorist or a money launderer by obtaining the above mentioned certificate from the funds originated country,and if you are found guilty as charged, you will go to jail.
    
    You have just only 72 hours to prove to us you are not a terrorist, failure to comply with our instruction, you will be arrested and detained until this matter is settled. Meanwhile we have your full contact address which makes it easier for us to arrest you when ever we want to.
    
    We are going to direct you on how to obtain the required document from the funds originated country in our next email to you, and your $10.5 million will be released to you as soon as the required document is obtained.
    
    Therefore you have been advised to get back to us immediately you receive this email or you will be arrested by the FBI, YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
    
    For more information's and quick response, reply back to us through this email address: washingtond.c2008@washington.usa.com)
    
    YOURS FAITHFULLY,
    
    Mr. Robert S. Mueller, III
    Director Federal Bureau of Investigation

[HansV]

We'll send you a postcard when you're in jail...

[John Gray]

Isn't it the case in the US that you are innocent unless you are proved to be a terrorist?
Or has the Homeland Security Act changed all that?!

Anyway, I suspect that you're guilty!

[Rebel]

Sounds pretty serious Al. Hope you're able to prove your innocence! If not, be sure and send us your new address.

[BobArch2]

For gawd's sake... shave off the beard... NOW!!! That should give you a few day's grace. Then let us know what size file to insert in your favorite cake and where to send it... Cuba, Leavenworth, wherever?

[Bigaldoc]

Hmmm, I hadn't thought of this when I made the post but there IS a Federal "slammer" right here in my town. So, they won't have to send me far.

And John, the only things I'm aware that I terrorize are the @#$%&* flies that seem to sneak in here when the weather starts getting colder. Now them, I hunt down and KILL like 007 ...

[PaulB]

Will you have Internet access in the Big House, Big Al?

[viking33]

Hmmm, I hadn't thought of this when I made the post but there IS a Federal "slammer" right here in my town. So, they won't have to send me far.

And John, the only things I'm aware that I terrorize are the @#$%&* flies that seem to sneak in here when the weather starts getting colder. Now them, I hunt down and KILL like 007 ...

Boy, I don't know what you did to get on THAT list! I hope you owned up to the seriousness of those charges and submitted all of the information they requested!
Now they have arranged to infest your house with those terrorist flies, too.

[hlewton]

So since you seem to still be around I assume you are now rich after having received all that money.

[rettingr]

Sorry Al,

While I didn't get as much cashola, at least I don't even have to prove my terrorism affiliation...

FROM THE DESK OF UNITED NATIONS TRUST FUND
Government Accredited Licensed Promoters!
United Nations Trust Fund
England Department of Humanitarian Affairs
Palais des Nations CH-1211 Geneva 10
England

Congratulations Beneficiary,

Your email has been selected by the United Nations(UN) for a cash grant
award of Six Hundred And Fifty Thousand Five hundred Pounds,
(£650,500.00 Pounds) for this year 2010 award.Your email address was
selected during our random email balloting for the cash grant and if you
receive this notification,it means that you are a lucky beneficiary of our
cash grant award.The united nations authorities has decided to give this
award to 15 beneficiaries from all over the world to help facilitate and
improve the standard of living to the Commission on the Limits of the
Continental Shelf for developing States, in particular the least developed
countries and small island developing States,and compliance with article
76 of the United Nations Convention on the Law of the Sea.This grant is
been aided by the United Nations development programme and the united
nations trust funds for human security.Your cash grant pin number is
(UNO-154/4456/011)

Our corresponding office (United Nations Trust Funds ) in United Kingdom
and they will give details on how your funds would be remitted to you. Do
contact our payment office immediately with the informations below.Your
grant numbers fall within your Location file, you are requested to contact
the event manager/Claims Department, send your winning identification
numbers and fill the verification form below,to enable him verify your
claims.

1.FULL NAMES OF DONATION BENEFICIARY:..................
2.RESIDENTIAL ADDRESS:........................
3.DATE AND PLACE OF BIRTH:.........................
4.WINNING EMAIL:...........................
5.PHONE/FAX NUMBERS:............................
6.NAME AND ADDRESS OF NEXT OF KIN:..............
7.SEX:.......................
8.OCCUPATION:...................
9.MARITAL STATUS:..................
10.COUNTRY:....................
11.NATIONALITY:.................

Do contact our payment office immediately with the informations below.

******************************************************************************
Payment Officer : Dr. Jeffrey Morris
Phone Number : +4470457 78230
Email: uncashgrantdept@gala.net

******************************************************************************

Regards,
Mr Ban Ki-moon.
(UNITED NATIONS SECRETARY GENERAL)

[Claude]

I think it's high time that we ban Mr. bigaldoc from this site, I don't want to be arrested just because we let him into this nuthouse

[HansV]

Palais des Nations CH-1211 Geneva 10
England

Nice detail!

[rettingr]

Palais des Nations CH-1211 Geneva 10
England

Nice detail!

But isn't that the Switzerland office?

[HansV]

In England?

[Bowlie]

Palais des Nations CH-1211 Geneva 10
England

Nice detail!

But isn't that the Switzerland office?

Actually the Palais is not part of Switzerland - As the UN's European HQ it is territory of the United Nations. Geneva and Switzerland have no jurisdiction on the grounds there. It is situated in Geneva, which has been (obviously) part of Switzerland for almost two hundred years.