call Holding, again ...

[ChrisGreaves]

You know how when you are on “call holding” and that man comes on and says “Thanks for holding. We are experiencing a higher-than-normal call volume at this moment in time, but our representatives are working hard to answer your call”, which of the following best matches your thoughts:-

(1) “at this moment in time” is a disgusting use of the english language
(2) Your representatives are not working hard to answer my call. The best we can hope for is that they are working hard to answer other people’s calls in order to work me up to the head of the long queue.
(3) If your representatives had any sense, they’d all be off stocking up with coffee and muffins because the longer I wait, the more questions, arguments and objections I come up with, and it looks now as if my phone call is going to take the best part of this morning.
(4) Why doesn’t this man go and help out at the help desk instead of mouthing this inane statement every ten seconds. At least at the help desk he could gofer coffees or something.

(signed) “Drumming Fingers” of Toronto

[HansV]

(2) for me...

My pet peeve is that here in The Netherlands, the message goes

"There are three persons waiting ahead of you"
"There are two persons waiting ahead of you"
"There is one person waiting ahead of you"

and then it's your turn. The last message should have been

"There are zero people waiting ahead of you" or "You are next in line".

[John Gray]

The time to worry is when the number of people waiting ahead of you starts increasing again...

[Jay Freedman]

I go with (1), (2), and (3) in rotation. As for (4), that recording was probably a freebie with the purchase of the answering system, and is the same for almost any company you call. Which reminds me of another disgusting misuse of the English language, advertising that offers a "free gift". If it isn't free, then it isn't a gift, n'est pas?

[John Gray]

You're right - nowadays it should be called a "for-free gift".

[Rudi]

Have you ever called a few seconds after the business apparently opens. If they open at 8:00am (for example) and you call 30 seconds after 8:00am, have you noticed that you still get the same message that there is a "higher-than-normal call volume at this moment in time, but our representatives are working hard to answer your call". This business is either REALLY busy or ALL have called in sick!

[Claude]

This business is either REALLY busy or ALL have called in sick!

Or, they have learnt from Ryanair and have mismanaged their staff allocation and have to inconvenience (for which they are of course sorry) some 400,000 people.

[Jay Freedman]

Rudi, are you hoping for honesty? Some message like "We know you have a problem, but we really don't want to hear about it." <click>

[Rudi]

Rudi, are you hoping for honesty? Some message like "We know you have a problem, but we really don't want to hear about it." <click>

As a matter of fact Jay, that would be quite refreshing! At least one will know where one stands with them and make informed decisions regarding the situation.

[ChrisGreaves]

"There are zero people waiting ahead of you" or "You are next in line".

So, I bet, too, that you were peeved when they brought in zero-origin indexing ...

[ChrisGreaves]

The time to worry is when the number of people waiting ahead of you starts increasing again...

You laugh! But I have been observing the queue in the Inter-Library loan system.
The queue fluctuates at the end, but we creep closer to the front of the queue - and then stay fixed there, unmoving, for months at a time while the queue gets longer and longer.

There are reasons for this, and the Toronto Public Library says it will look at it.
But I doubt that it will adopt any of my solutions.
Cheers
Chris